Jane Barbone, standup comedienne

Ok, so I'll give you a taste of my comedy but you'll have to actually read it & imagine me on stage performing it.
All rights reserved. @Jane Barbone.com
None of the following jokes may be used w/o prior consent from author, Jane Barbone.

"I'm convinced the reason women get cellulite is because we refuse to pass gas in public.
It has to go somewhere.
You don't see many men with cellulite."

"Ok guys here's the real reason women love shoes...
Because we don't have to fit them up over our butts.
No hip to waist ratio going on with shoes.
They fit, we buy every color."

"So, I'm living in the bay area which seems to have
become the hub of stem cell research.
I can see it now. Another 20 years we'll be sitting at home
in front of our "WALL" TV's...Late night infomercial..."
"Do you secretly fantasize about engaging in an orgy
but don't want to cheat on your spouse?
Have them Cloned!
For 666 dollars we'll send a color brochure
detailing how you can have your loved ones cloned.
Call NOW & we'll send absolutely free, "Sexy Sue,
Spouse Sam & their Six Clones
Satisfy Several Sexual Fantasies".
A must see six hour video on how cloning
can improve your marital realtions.
Don't delay call today;
That's 1-666-666-6666
or send 666 dollars to
Clone-a-Cell
666 DNA Way
Anomaly, NY 66666
Operators & their clones standing by now.
Any Visa or a duplicate accepted."

"What would I have if I cloned myself?
Two people in therapy."

"My name is Jane. The first name you ever read in a book.
"See Jane. See Dick. See Dick Run."
Oh, the prophecy."

Jane Barbone's Video Clips